It's all good.

I have been saying that for years and this morning I found myself remembering that sometimes it is just that - all good.

I woke up this morning at 6:30, glanced out the window and saw the most beautiful sunrise, it was amazing, knowing it was going to be a long day I rolled over and got a little more sleep. The boys got up happy and excited about the coming days and it was a pleasure to get them off to school. I heard birds this morning, not just one or two but a springtime chorus of birds singing as I took the dogs outside. It was a good start to the day and caused me to stop and think for a few minutes about the last year of our lives.

Last year at this time I was plowing through a homestudy and feeding puppies at all hours. I was dreaming and wondering about kids, foster kids, adopted kids, little feet and voices in our house. I wondered what it would be like to be a parents to more then a pack of animals I called my children. Could I do it? Would I be a good Mom? Who would be here? What would there stories be?

If you had asked me then where I would today I probably would not of known what to say. Life has a way of taking the path you least expect when you least expect it. When the social worker first told of us the boys I said no - I didn't want a separated sibling group, I wanted the whole group. Then she told us again about them and I let go of my expectations, I let go of what I thought about what it was that I wanted and I decided to trust that whatever kids ended up here were the ones that needed to be here. I heard more about my boys, more about their story, the things that they would needed, the things they liked and the things they disliked and I knew that these were the boys for us.

In July we met 2 sweet boys, one very scared of yet another move and one who needed to fill the silence with his words and actions. Those little boys needed a family and we were it. 2 weeks later they moved in. It has been a long 8 months, it has not been easy and I never for a moment thought it would be but I do not regret a minute of it either.

Calvin helped me hang laundry on the line today and I thought to myself about how far he has come in the last few months, what a different little boy he is now. Fudge got organised with a minimal amount of prompting yesterday - a huge step for him - he ahs changed so much from the little boy who wouldn't even talk to me when we met. They have grown in the last 8 months, physically of courses, as all children do. But more importantly emotionally, they are more sure of themselves, many behaviours have disappeared or only come out when they are stressed. They believe us when we say that they are staying, they don't ask when they are moving anymore. They are excited to meet new family and friends instead of just terrified, like they were in the summer. They look forward to and talk about our future together as a family. It's all good.

Tomorrow we go to court, we get the stamps and that is it, they will be ours or we will be theirs depending on your point of view. It's going to be a good day with lots of celebrating and enjoying being together. My sister is coming from sunny California and we will gather with family and friends to celebrate again on Friday.

I'll be back next week with pictures and such. It's family first around here for the next few days. It's all good though.

Because she is fabulous

She, being my older sister (who is flying here all the way from sunny CA next week to be here for the boys adoption day) asked me to tell you all about this really fun thing that my BIL is doing. Since he's a great guy and since it is a fun project I think you should click on through and take a look. If you are a twitter addict you might really like some of the cool stuff you can do using both programs, go read the blog to find out more.
The kid channel is lots of fun if you have small people who like little bits of songs or have short attention spans ( not that I would know any of those).

spring madness

Spring has sprung here and that means that I would rather be outside than in at the computer, that and it is March Break which means that the boys are home, which means I am outside.

We all survived camp and had lots fun and way to much sugar! We are having a fairly quiet week around here. Epic games of monopoly, seed planting, dentist appts for me and Calvin ( I now have some very pricey crowns that I have needed for a long time and C is about to get a retainer), therapy and yesterday we went out with firends to Mer Bleu and watch chickadees eat seed out of the boys hands - fantastic! (I'll show you as soon as S. emails me the pictures - hint, hint, hint)

To keep you amused here are some pictures - there has been lots of talk about adoption day this week and the conversations cause much stress that is then relieved in typical little boy fashion - being silly. This was Monday night.

In 10 minutes or less.

I have 10 minutes to post and then I have to get myself out the door because Fudge has play therapy this morning and then Calvin has attachment therapy this afternoon and I am insane for booking them both in the same day - there really wasn't any other choices this week. I wanted to post though so here I am.

• Tara was here from Sudan I drove into the big city for dinner and knitting. It was great fun. I miss knitting with friends but the drive seems like such a long one now that I am busy with small people.
• The sock that I have been knitting since July now has a heel, yes since July. There has been little knitting around here.
• Fudge told us last night that he "purple diarrhea", we were a little taken aback and then realised he meant verbal diarrhea. He also told P. that the violence in the guided imagery on his ipod needed to be changed. P was confused and talked to him about the violence and where it was in the recording - he meant violin.
• I got to go seed shopping with Jo and company this weekend, I love planning the garden, it makes me happy for spring.
• We are going to cub camp this weekend, I am bringing my pillow ( new and very comfy) and buying some earplugs to block out the snoring leaders.
• We had some lovely spring like weather this weekend and I was lulled into a false sense of spring. It snowed yesterday and will be cold again later this week.
• It looks as though (cross your fingers) the adoption will go through at the end of the month, the paperwork has all now been filed and we are just waiting for a time to show up. We keep telling the boys the boys that they will stamp our family name on their foreheads, they don't believe us.
• Calvin earned his badge at cubs this week, if I had known how happy it would make him I would of pushed him a little harder to get it done. Nothing like seeing a little man very proud of his accomplishments.

There's more but time is up, I'll be back but probably not before spending a weekend sleeping on the floor.

this ones good!

Let me set the stage:

A sunny but cold Sunday afternoon in the country, 2 boys are playing nicely in the yard of the old farm house. The dogs are barking at the kids and Mom is in the house making dinner. Mom decided to take advantage of the calm while the roast cooks and heads upstairs to watch the remainder of last nights movie ( the one that got turned off due to exhaustion) She is happily watching the movie with P, she hears the children come in and out a few times but they are happy. The movie ends, she decides to change into a t shirt and just as she is doing that the bedroom door flies open - the child is reminded that closed doors mean that you need to knock first. The child clothes the door and knocks, I say to wait, he says it's really important!!!! I need you right now. We leave the bedroom wondering they have gotten themselves into this time.

"Fudge is bleeding" Calvin says ( remember he is Calvin for reason)
"Why is Fudge bleeding? " I ask calmly
"Because he stuck his tongue to the metal pole"
" He did WHAT!"
By which point I had reached Fudge and he was indeed bleeding, he didn't just stick his tongue to the cold metal pole he stuck his tongue and his lip to the pole and then pulled himself off. We calmed him down, got the bleeding to slow a bit so we could asses the damage and as the crisis passed I asked Fudge if he knew what would happen when he stuck his tongue on a cold metal pole - wait for it...

"Yes" he says " I did it once at school when I was 5"
"So what on earth would make you do it again" says the reasonably calm parent.
"Calvin told me to" he says

Fudge got ice cream for dinner.

Calvin is in trouble, Calvin knew damn well what he was up to. Calvin has to clean the boys room, he is banned from the playroom for a week and had to surrender his new favourite stuffie. I think, given that he did not have a tantrum as the punishment was decided, (with his input) that he understands that he made a really poor choice this time around.